The Wasp and the Hawk
by madam-may
Summary: Wasp is alone and upset after Ant-Man leaves her and the Avengers. Who is there to help? Hawkeye. Only his way of helping isn't what you'd call 'typical.' And it could lead to more trouble than triumph.
1. To Steal An Ant-Man: Part One

**I do not own characters or minor plot lines mentioned in this fic. They all go to the beautiful minds at Marvel :) **

**Author note:** _There will changes in point of view (alternating between Wasp and Hawkeye). Please review! :)x_

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Code name: Wasp**

**7:55 am**

Don't ask me how it happened – one minute I'm mad at Hank, next thing you know Hawkeye's kissing me and I don't wanna do a thing about it. I believe my thoughts were… well I don't believe I had any thoughts other than huh-muh-nah, huh-muh-nah, huh-muh-nah.

Turns out Hawkeye is a really good kisser. And he's good at other things…

That's off topic! Also, I've now realised you have _no _idea what the hell I'm talking about.

I will explain – if you promise not to judge me.

Promise?

Good. Okay. Here goes nothing…

**6:30 pm (13 hours before)**

"_I'm done. I'm done with the Avengers."_

"_I get that – I just –"_

"_I'm leaving." _

"_Leaving what? You're leaving the Avengers? You're leaving me?" _

"_We want different things." _

'Stupid Henry 'Hank' Pym.' I thought venomously. I was in my room in Avengers Mansion, thinking over the argument Hank and I had had when he came back to clean up his things. I still couldn't believe he was quitting for good. How could he leave? Hank and I had been together since I became Wasp – losing him was like losing a part of myself.

Hank had left the Mansion about half an hour ago and I was trying to convince myself not to fly to his college lab and kick his butt back here. Hank belonged with the Avengers, he belonged with me. My ID card was on my bed and it suddenly started ringing. I snatched up quickly – one of my team could be in trouble.

"Jan…" came his soft voice.

"Hank? Are you seriously calling me? I'm shocked you still have your ID card. Figured you would've burned it before it made you beat someone up." Sarcasm dripped from my words – trash talking came naturally to me. Although I was actually shocked he still had his card – Hank wasn't really one for sentiment.

"Jan, listen." Hank said but I was too riled up to listen to whatever crap he had to say.

"What – are you calling to quit again? I get it Hank; you're not 'Avengers material.' You made it perfectly clear." I was too angry to see the hurt in Hank's eyes, to see the pain my words caused him. "I just didn't want to believe it. I'd never sit around and cry about things like Ultron – I'd do something about it. So the question is Hank, what do you want?" Hank paused and took a deep breath.

"I just… wanted to tell you that I'm sorry." The screen went blank but I continued to stare at it in shock. He was sorry? Sorry for what? Screwing _everything_ up? I threw the card at the mattress.

"Ugh!" I cried, my wasp stings encircling my hands. I looked around for something to shoot. The mirror I used in the mornings was the first thing to catch my eye and it exploded as my sting hit it. I then attacked the chair that was in front the desk I had.

"Miss Van Dyne, what are you doing?" JARVIS said and I spun around. "I am sending a message throughout the Mansion to signal your distress –" JARVIS stopped speaking as the intercom shattered. I knew no one was home – everyone was working on their individual projects today. They would gather if a villain began playing up. I continued the destruction of my room.

It was about half an hour later when I slowed my stings. Hurt was beginning to overpower my anger. Tears formed in my eyes and I raised my hands to wipe them away. There was a faint knock on the door. The door opened slowly and I turned, my hands forming a gun with the sting on the tips on my fingers.

"Jan?" came Clint Barton's soft voice. "JARVIS just told me you're destroying the house." Hawkeye poked his head round the door and froze upon seeing me ready to blast him. I knew he longed to have his bow in his hands. Clint entered though, keeping his hands up in surrender. "Woah, Jan, breathe. It's okay. I'm not gunna hurt you. I'm here to help."

"Help?" I said. "Help? How can you help? Are you gunna bring Hank back so I can kick his butt?" My wasp stings were wavering and I soon dropped my hands. Clint made his way further into my room. It was then I noticed that he wasn't in his suit – instead he wore fashionable jeans and blue shirt.

"No, I won't do that. Don't get me wrong, I want to. However I don't think it would be best for the Avengers image." I smiled at Clint, knowing that's what he wanted. He looked around my destroyed room. "So this is what you do when you get pissed, huh?"

"Yeah, it was great." I said in a monotone, plonking down on my bed.

"I'd have gone to the training room." Said Clint, taking a seat next to me. I shrugged, looking away. "What's wrong Jan?" I looked back up to Clint's serious eyes. He was normally the joker and seeing him rather serious was strange.

"Do you know I became Wasp, Clint?" I said, knowing he would need an explanation.

"Yes – Hank gave you a supply of Pym particles and you underwent a procedure to get your powers." Clint replied.

"You've been reading my file." I accused with narrow eyes. Clint shrugged.

"I read everyone's – some habits don't leave you no matter how long you're away from S.H.I.E.L.D."

"Fine, fine. Well there's more to it than that. If you wanna know what's wrong, you're gunna have to hear all that too." Clint moved so he was resting against my pillows. His hands were behind his head and he crossed his feet.

"Do tell," Clint patted the space beside him and I sighed. I tried to relax as I sat next to him. Then I began to speak.

I told him how Hank and my father were working on a project together – this was after Hank had created the Pym particles and created the Ant man/Giant man suit. I told Clint how they had unleashed an alien monster and that it had killed my father. I told him how Hank had changed me and how we then hunted the alien down before sending it back to its own dimension. I told Clint how Hank and I argued – my money and his science always got in the way. We could never make things work. I talked for about half an hour with Clint occasionally asking questions. I had never spoken to anyone about this and it felt good to let it all out. I exploded a few more things too.

It was near 9:30 when I finished talking. Clint had remained attentive the entire time. I sat up properly when I finished my tale, closing my eyes. Crying was not something I wanted to do again. I knew men hated crying women and I wasn't one to show weakness.

"Jan…" came his soft voice. I felt a warm, rough hand on my shoulder and I looked round into Hawkeye's blue eyes. We were still and silent for a moment before Clint kissed me. It wasn't sweet and innocent like when Hank and I kissed – it was heated, passionate, fiery. I turned around, ending up kneeled next to him. His hand slid off my shoulder and down my arm, leaving goose bumps in its wake. Clint tugged on my lower lip gently with both of his lips. I opened my eyes as he did. Clint let go and smiled playfully-

_If I may interject quickly, I just want to say: I almost died on the spot. Dead. On the spot. Right there. It was the cutest and sexiest thing I have seen in a long time. But moving on…_

-I wrapped my hand around the back of his neck and pulled him in for another intense kiss. He hummed in the back of his throat slightly and one of his hands came to rest on my thigh. Clint brushed his tongue along my bottom lip. I pressed closer and parted my lips, giving him deeper access. His tongue brushed mine as his hand slid up my thigh and I was suddenly brought back to my senses. I pulled away, wide eyed. Clint watched me with concern.

"Whoa, Jan, breathe. Breathe." He said, leaning toward me.

"No – I mean – We just – We don't – I –" I couldn't get the words out. What was I thinking? Oh, wait, I wasn't.

"Jan, stop. Breathe." This time I listened to him and took a deep breath. I could still taste him on my lips and tongue. My _god_, what had I done? "You're still thinking," he said resignedly. I took another deep breath.

"Wha… What about Widow? What about… oh, Hank. Oh my god…" I dropped my head into my hands.

"Widow and I were finished a long time ago." Said Clint, a new hardness to his voice. I looked up, heaps of questions in my eyes. "She betrayed me – we were partners, she was my best – we were partners. Little Tasha Romanoff. The girl that the world screwed over. One of S.H.I.E.L.D.'s best agents and one half of their greatest team. She was working for Hydra at Fury's orders but she still framed me as a double agent. I went to the Vault just so she didn't fuck up her mission and then she came crying back to me, asking for help. I would never have done that to her." Clint's voice was hard, angry. I'd heard him talk like this about Widow before but we'd never been alone. And we hadn't just made out. "And what of Hank? Well, that's your call." His voice became resigned, almost too uncaring.

"You loved her? Or you do love her?" I guessed. I didn't understand – from what I knew the Widow was unfeeling, heartless. How could Clint love her?

"That was a long time ago." He almost spat. I nodded, not knowing that to say. Finally Clint spoke again. "She and I weren't together like you and Hank. We worked together and slept together. We were best friends too. I felt something – and she said she did too. But it never went further than that." I tried to catch Clint's eye once he finished. It seemed he wouldn't say any more on the subject.

"Why did you kiss me?" Clint's eyes immediately turned to me and I bit my lip.

"Everybody needs a release once in a while," a playful smirk was on Clint's face and realisation slowly dawned on me.

"You only want to… have sex? Nothing more? Just… as friends?" What was Hawkeye thinking? Or was I jumping to conclusions?

"Well… if you and Hank are over?"

'This is crazy-

-But it could work.-

-Wait, what am I thinking? I couldn't do that.-

-Or could I? There is no denying that Hawkeye is very attractive-

-Jan, snap out of it. What about Hank-

-Ugh! What about him? He left, he doesn't give a damn. Move on-

-But so soon?-

-You and Hank have been over for a while and you know it. It didn't just happen today.' It had been but a second since Clint had answered me but my thoughts were going crazy. 'Why the hell not?' I thought, surprising myself. Clint was watching me and I knew my thoughts would be playing out across my face.

"Why me?" I asked. I felt stupid asking heaps of questions but I hardly understood.

"You _are_ the only girl on the team." Clint smiled and my brow creased.

"Miss Marvel?" I pointed out. Clint's face turned to an expression of disgust. "You two have issues huh?"

"Do you really wanna get into that now?" he asked, smirking. I sighed.

"What if us doing... _that_ ruins this? Us being friends. Or the team. What about the Avengers?" I asked. Clint leaned in and softly kissed me. I instinctively leaned in too, my hand coming up to cup his face. He smiled against my lips before pulling away.

"Why don't we just see what happens?" he murmured, his voice husky. I shivered and kissed him again. He smiled once more and pulled me closer. I was practically straddling him. Clint kissed the edge of my mouth and then across to my neck. I pressed closer as his hands slid up my thighs…

**8:01 am. **

So basically I'm screwed – and if I say I was screwed last night I will zap you into tomorrow.

I've said I'll be fuck buddies with Hawkeye and we had sex last night.

I am so screwed.


	2. To Steal An Ant-Man: Part Two

**See disclaimer in Chap one :)**

**Author note:**_ This chap is being told from Hawkeye's point of view - as said the chaps with alternate between the pair. Please review! I love reading them. Enjoy :)x_

**Name: Clint Barton  
Code name: Hawkeye**

**7:30pm **

Things had been awkward since the night before last. Jan avoided me like I was diseased and I knew her brain would be running a mile a minute with more questions than she could ask.

I hadn't wanted it to be like this. I knew she was worried about what would happen between us after we screwed – I blew it off, not thinking she would react like this. Damage control was definitely something I needed to attend to.

I should probably explain though, hey? It might make it a bit easier for you to sympathise. Or empathise. Whatever one it is – I grew up in a circus, okay? Let's move on…

Two days ago, Henry 'Hank' Pym left the Avengers for good. Two days ago, he and Janet Van Dyne fought and she practically destroyed her room here at the Mansion. I went to comfort her and hopefully get distracted from my own troubles.

You see two days ago was the same day I saved Tasha Romanoff 3 years ago. And after all she'd done to me it was the last thing I wanted to think about. I needed a distraction.

Video games were always great.

Shooting arrows worked too.

Or there was sex. Sex was the best distraction I'd ever discovered – and trust me, I'd discovered a few over my time.

The fact that Jan needed a distraction just happened to be a happy accident. So, I'd gone to her destroyed room to comfort her, being a good team mate and all. I just couldn't resist getting her to comfort me at the same time without her even realising it.

There's something else I need to admit – Tasha and I had had a similar relationship when we worked for S.H.I.E.L.D. We mixed work and 'play'. It mightn't have worked out so well in the long run but you only live once and in our line of work your number could be up any day. However, I often didn't 'play' with Tasha – and she didn't 'play' with me. There was a plethora of agents working at S.H.I.E.L.D. desperate for a night with either one of us. Or both.

Ah, good times.

But I no longer worked in the 'playground.' I now worked with Captain America (oldest guy in the world), Iron Man (a.k.a. Tony Stark and sarcasm personified), Black Panther (also known as T'Challa, King of Wakanda and dry humour), The Hulk (the angry side of great scientist Bruce Banner) and Miss Marvel (Agent Carol Danvers of S.W.O.R.D. or as I call her Miss Divided Loyalty). And Wasp a.k.a. Miss Janet Van Dyne.

I was no incredibly low on choices. Since Miss Marvel and I had issues (don't even get me started) I decided to visit Wasp.

Best decision I've made since joining the Avengers. Except now it was kind of biting me on the arse. Jan was freaking out a little (okay, maybe a lot) and if I didn't sort everything out soon my fellow team members would know something was up.

"JARVIS, can you locate Wasp for me, please?" I waited for the AI to respond, praying no one entered the main lounge. Explaining why I was looking for Wasp would definitely have them wondering what was going on.

"She is in her room. I cannot contact her due to her rage yesterday. Would you like me to contact her through her Avengers ID Card?"

"No JARVIS that's fine. Thanks," I silently made my way through the house. When I reached the corridor to all of our rooms I paused. "JARVIS, is anyone in their room right now?"

"No, sir. Iron Man is in the assembly room, Captain America-"

"Yeah, thanks." Sometimes JARVIS was _overly_ helpful. I approached Jan's door and took a deep breath. Please, God, can I not screw this up? Please? I knocked softly at the door, similarly to how I had two days before.

"Who is it?" came Jan's suspicious voice. Apparently she recognised my knock too. I opened the door and peeked my head in.

"It's me. We need to talk," Jan looked up from the manila folder she had on her lap. She was biting her bottom lip and I couldn't help but remember how it felt to have her soft lips on mine.

"Uh, sure. Come-" She was cut off by the sound of our ID Cards ringing. I pulled mine out of my pocket and Jan lifted hers off her bed.

"Avengers to the assembly room. This is something you're gunna want to see." Tony said before the screen went blank. I looked up as Wasp approached me.

"Let's go." She said and I hesitated. Jan sighed. "We can talk after the meeting, okay?" I nodded and followed her through the house.

We all took our seats around the table and Tony began.

"This message was sent about half an hour ago – I only just got it because JARVIS was running checks. It's from Hank." I tensed in my seat and my eyes flickered to Jan. She watched on with an unreadable expression. Tony brought up the message and a hologram of Hank appeared.

"There is a new Ant-Man. I won't go into details but basically I've handed the suit on to someone else. Someone better who is willing to do the things I can't. His name's Scott Lang – he's an electronics expert. Contact him if you want to replace me. I don't plan on creating another suit – I haven't really planned anything. I won't use my Avengers ID Card anymore; if you need me, you know where to find me. With that, I guess there's nothing else to say…" The screen went black and we all looked to Tony.

"That was the message." He looked to Jan. "Do you know why he would've passed the suit on?" Jan's eyes were hard and I knew a whole lot of anger was about to come out. I was half expecting her to blow something up.

"Why are you asking me? Because it's Hank? I don't know him any better than you do these days. The Hank Pym who turned me into Wasp and helped me avenge my father isn't the same Hank Pym who walked out of here two days ago or who left that message. I don't know who Hank is anymore and I haven't for quite some time." Jan stood and walked out, her head high. I knew she would hide her tears until she was alone – Jan hated showing weakness.

The door slammed behind her and the rest of us turned to look at one another. I held in the comments I would've thrown at Tony in Jan's defence.

"I'm not going after her." Said Hulk, crossing his arms over his chest. He glared at Tony.

"How is it my fault?" Tony cried, holding his arms up in surrender. "I was only asking a question, c'mon, you can't blame me for her getting upset!" I sighed and ran a hand through my hair.

"It doesn't matter who made her upset – and since I comforted her last time, I know how to cheer her up. I dread to think what Tony would say." I got up and made my way out of the room, ignoring the stares of the remaining Avengers.

"What?" came Jan's testy voice after I knocked softly. I opened the door and entered. "Hawkeye, I'm not in the mood. I can't be thinking about all-" She'd got up from where she was sitting and walked towards me.

"Jan," I interrupted, walking forward to grip her upper arms (gently of course) and look into her tear-filled eyes. "I'm not here to talk about that. I'm here to comfort you – however you want me to." Jan looked at me for a moment longer before throwing her arms around my neck and practically burying her face in the crook that joined my neck and shoulders. I stood frozen for a second before I wrapped my arms around her waist. We stood like that for a while – Jan wetting my t-shirt with her tears. Finally she pulled away.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lose control like that. It just all got too much for me." Jan turned and walked away, climbing on her bed.

"Talk to me, Jan. It might make you feel better." I followed her but sat on the opposite side. She wiped away the last of her tears.

"Let's talk about you and me. What did you want to say earlier?" Jan looked at me with wide eyes and I took a deep breath.

God, remember me asking you to not let me stuff up? Best you pay attention now.

"Well… You were avoiding me and I wanted to make sure everything was okay. I don't want to lose you as a friend Jan and any fights that happen between us will become apparent to the others. I wanted to make sure there was no confusion." I said slowly, hoping not offend her in any way – I'd seen what she did to the intercom in her room. As well as the mirror and the chair.

"You've obviously done this before. I never have. I don't know what this relationship bit means. I just don't know." Jan admitted quietly. I leaned in and kissed her innocently on the lips.

"Jan, this can stop at any time, okay? But to explain it in the simplest way possibly… we're friends who have sex but we can still date someone else if we want to. Obviously when one of us becomes romantically involved the friends-sleeping-with-each-other bit is void. And as I said, we can stop at any time and start at any time. We just both have to want to."

I'll admit that was terrible. I expected her to tell me to leave and that I was never seeing her naked again. Or seeing her ever again. Would she expect me to leave the Avengers? Or would she leave? Who else did she have to go to?

"Okay… okay. That sounds reasonable. Do… do you want to?" Jan said slowly, blushing hugely. I too felt warmth on my cheeks.

"Uh, yeah. I mean if Hank's out of the picture." Jan's face hardened.

"He most definitely is." I smiled at her taunt jaw.

"Relax Waspy – you never have to worry about him again, if you don't want to." I crooked a finger under her chin and pulled her face closer to mine.

"Waspy-" she began to protest. I soon stopped her by kissing her, just like I had the two nights before. One of Jan's hands came to rest on my neck. Both of us kneeled and I pulled her close. Our bodies were pressed close and both of my hands slid up the back of her thighs. Soon they gripped her arse tightly and Jan pressed closer again, her hands tangling in my hair.

Looked like tonight was going to be a good night too.

I woke up after Jan the next morning. She lay with her head resting on my shoulder, her fingers lazily trailing over my chest. I shivered and Jan turned her head to grin up at me.

"Morning," she said in a sleepy voice. Jan had pulled the blankets up to cover our naked bodies – although this was a good precaution we were still screwed if someone walked in.

"Hey," I said, raising my hand to rub the sleep out of my eyes. We were silent then, enjoying each other's company. "You're still okay with this, right?" I asked, knowing how quickly Jan could change her mind.

"Yes," she said, with a slight laugh. "Stop checking." Wasp gently nudged my side and I looked down at her with raised eyebrows. She bit her lip to stop from giggling. I then nudged her back and she laughed. I grinned.

"You think that's funny do you?" I asked, my voice a little husky. Jan stopped and looked at me with wide eyes. I moved so that I was straddling her and I pinned her arms above her head. We looked at each other for a moment, a strange tension in the air. I then let go of her arms and became tickling her. Jan shrieked and writhed underneath me, causing our bodies to rub against one another.

"No, Hawkeye, stop!" she cried through her laughter and squeals. My hands stopped their torture of her and I rolled so we were lying next to each other again. I looked at her with a serious expression.

"That's not what you said last night."


	3. Michael Korvac

**See disclaimer in chap one :)**

**Author Note:** _Just going to explain a few things quickly :) okay... I have named the chapter after what episode of Earth's Mightiest Heroes they would coincide with. I'm trying to make it accurate. Secondly, there is going to dialogue and action from the show throughout most chapters. I do not claim ownership of this and am merely using it to show how the characters (which I also don't claim ownership of) are feeling in relation to the other. Also, do you guys want some dirty scenes between Jan and Clint? Please review and tell me or pm me. I love getting your thoughts on the fic. Any other questions will be answered too! Otherwise enjoy and pretty please review! Let me know what you think! :)x _

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Codename: Wasp**

**8:55 am**

"Yes- yes-oh-YES!" I cried, bouncing up and down. Hawkeye bounced with me, our bodies rubbing against each other. The door opened and we immediately looked.

"Don't you have anything better to do than play video games?" asked Black Panther from the door. I looked to Hawkeye from my place next to him, shrugged and then looked back to T'Challa.

"Not really." Said Hawkeye. Black Panther rolled his eyes and left, the door banging slightly as he closed it. I laughed loudly, smiling at my fourth straight victory.

"You really suck at this," I said, putting my controller down and flopping backwards onto Hawkeye's bed. He glared at me and I winked. "Like, really really suck at it." I emphasised as he dropped his controller on the floor.

"Do you want me to tickle you again?" he threatened and I immediately shut up. Clint grinned and sat down next to me, his eyes trailing over my body.

It was our second week of casually sleeping together and our fellow Avengers were none the wiser. Things were going well – it didn't affect our crime fighting abilities nor was our friendship any different. Except that we now spent more time with each other. Both Hawkeye and I hoped the others put it down to Clint being the one who comforted me when Hank left so I was naturally clinging to him.

I hated being put in the "typical woman" position. Luckily, Hawkeye never treated me that way.

Namely out of fear, I'm sure.

Although there were moments, much like this one, where Clint made me feel beautiful and desirable without treating me any differently. By him simply letting his eyes drift over me, I felt wanted.

"Hey, Hawkeye?" I said, worrying slightly about my question. His eyes immediately came to rest on my face. "What are we gunna do if someone finds out?" Clint smiled.

"This is gunna sound terribly cliché but Widow once said to me that you can't prepare for a battle if you don't know what enemies you're facing. I took it to mean that you just have to face each battle as it comes. I guess… I think that's what we should do here." I nodded and Clint smiled. "I'm gunna hit the training room for a bit – want to join me?" he asked after a few moments of comfortable silence. I shook my head and sat up.

"I think I'll hit the shower actually." I saw the familiar mischievous glint in Clint's eyes and I knew some flirty/seedy comment was coming.

"If you're in there too long I might just have to join you." I patted his cheek as I stood up, a smirk on my face.

"In your dreams, sweet heart." I couldn't help the extra little bit of swing in my hips as I walked out.

**1:30 pm**

I was sitting, bored, in the guest room Tony insisted I sleep in until my room was fixed. When he had suggested it I'd almost said:

"I don't a room – I'm sleeping in Hawkeye's."

Thank god that hadn't slipped out, right? However that was the truth – I'd slept in Hawkeye's bed for 6 or 7 nights. And before you judge me, no we hadn't had sex every night. And both of us were perfectly okay with that.

One night we played video games till like 3 in the morning. Another we watched my favourite movies and then the next we watched his.

He fell asleep during mine and I fell asleep during his. It was a fair deal.

A couple of nights we'd just stayed up late talking about whatever – I'd learned more about his growing up in a circus and he had asked me about my father and my life before Wasp.

… _Oh god. I sound like one of those teenage girls with a new crush. Ew. Just remember you promised no judgement. Let's move on…_

There were two topics we both actively avoided for the other persons sake – Hank and Widow. However I did need to talk to someone about what happened. I was starting to feel a little crazy. Lucky for me (in some ways) I have monitor duty tonight and Carol is going to call. She can listen to me rant about Hank for an hour or two, right?

Now that I've thought about it, I don't actually think about Hank that much. It's more of this nagging frustration in the back of my mind that I need to get out. The person who I'd been thinking about a lot was Hawkeye. The little things he did – like if he needed to slip out somewhere in the morning and I was only half awake he always kissed my cheek or my temple. It made me feel less cheap when I woke up properly.

Or when we were fooling around, he always made sure I orgasmed – I couldn't work out if it was because it was hot for him or because he was a good guy. I leaned towards good guy as much as possible.

Another good guy trait (he has lots, I'm just pointing out the ones I've noticed recently) is that when we watched the movies, it wasn't like having a best friend sleep over. We weren't sitting beside each other, handing the popcorn back and forth. Hawkeye had his arms around me so I was leaning against him. The popcorn was easy to reach for both of us and when I was nearly asleep (on the night we watched his movies) he leant over and softly kissed my forehead. I swear to god I nearly exploded from the cuteness of it all.

And last but not least, when we are alone, he becomes a bit more 'boyfriend-y' and flirty towards me. He makes me feel like I actually matter and it's totally different to how it was with Hank. Some people didn't even know we were together (if you could call it that) until one of us said something. I feel closer to Clint after like two weeks than I ever did with Hank and that was a few decent years. It's been hard getting Hawkeye out of my head.

On some days it was hard keeping him out of my pants too.

**9:05 pm**

"… Jan, if Hank really cared… he wouldn't have left." I rested my head on my arms as Miss Marvel's words washed over me. I sighed and began to close my eyes. But of course as that moment of relaxation washed over me, the doorbell rang.

"I've got to run, someone's at the door." I stood and began to walk away. "Hopefully someone who's better at cheering me up than you are." I couldn't help the smart arse comment – perhaps I had been spending too much time with Hawkeye. Or maybe I just was a smart arse.

As I made my way to the door I pondered Carol's last comment.

"_If Hank really cared… he wouldn't have left."_ It was true – if Hank had really given a damn he would've stayed and fought what he and I had.

Although what he and I had, I wasn't quite sure about.

Would Hawkeye stay and fight for what he and I had, whatever it was? Was it a friendship with sex built in? Or sex with a friendship built in? It was a fine line and sometimes I wondered if we'd better off getting rid of one side – the question was: which?

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**9:20 pm**

I walked towards Jan's slim figure, knowing she would probably be biting her lip with worry over the crazy guy she and Jane had strapped to the table.

"I'm pretty sure I've seen this movie before," I said, half hoping to break the tension. I felt a tiny fist pound into my shoulder. "Hey, what'd you hit me for? You're the one who zapped him into unconsciousness." Jan's face fell and disappointment shone in her eye. I knew I was gunna pay for that later. Knowing I was bound to get zapped a few times I thought I might as well make it worth it. "And I'm supposed to buy that this guy was abducted by aliens and experimented on. Come _on,_" I looked to Jan and saw her eyes hardening with determination.

"You didn't see the look in his eyes. He's scared." Jan turned from the window to address the three of us – Tony and T'Challa had followed me in. "He's been going in and out of consciousness. Jane and I have been able to piece a lot of it together…" Jan began to explain what had happened to the currently shuddering man but I couldn't help but pay more attention to her than the story.

Something wasn't right – her voice was off and her emotions were even clearer than normal. I guessed it had something to do with the discovery of this guy – or she and I were spending way too much time together.

"…She could be his girlfriend or his wife. Who knows how long he's been gone," she finished and I zoned back in, still concerned about the overly apparent worry in her worry in her eyes.

The conversation went on – all of us putting in our two cents worth about how Korvac would react when he woke up. I believed he would flip out and I think Jan is on my side.

"Well, crazy or not there's a crater in Central Park. He didn't make that up. Hawkeye, Panther, go check it out. I'll stay here with Jane and-" said Tony. He was then interrupted by Wasp who was miniaturising herself so she could fly.

_By the way, that miniaturising thing is pretty damn kinky let me tell you. But moving on…_

"I'm going to find Corrina!" she cried and I looked at her, frowning slightly. What if this guy's misses was as crazy as him? Wasp could get into trouble – and there I nearly went again. I need to stop worrying about her.

"Er, not exactly what I was going to say." Said Tony hesitantly. Apparently, he was scared of getting zapped too. Jan flew close to him.

"She's probably been looking for him this whole time. We can use some facial-recognition-thing-a-ma-jig to see if any one put out a missing persons alert on him – 'cause it's probably her!" Jan flew out of the room and I held in a sigh.

"Okay then," said Tony, pretty much summing up how I felt. Jan really didn't think of the dangers before she did something. Mind you, who was I to talk?

**9:40 pm**

"I still don't buy it." I said to Panther, namely to keep the conversation going. If it didn't my head was probably going to explode from thoughts of Jan. She'd buzzing around my head for days and the constant smell of her in my room wasn't helping. "Maybe the guy did get taken by little green men."

"Or blue," said T'Challa solemnly. I cringed. Was I better off with thoughts or Jan or smart arse comments from Mr Cat here?

"Stop it. What I'm saying is there's something off about this guy." Especially the way Jan was so protective of him. What was up with that?

Wait a second, was I jealous of a crazy guy from outer space? What was going on with me?

"Perhaps after weeks or even months of experimentation by alien creatures, any one would be _off_," said Panther. What did I tell you? … Dry humour, that is correct. Or just a comment made to mess with my head.

I'm gunna go with both.

"Now you're just being difficult to mess with me."

"You are right." I rolled my eyes at the satisfaction in T'Challa's voice. I may have to try and kill him.

On our way home, we were silent and my mind began to work over time. Jan and I had been spending more time together than I ever thought we would – and I didn't want to do a thing about it. I felt so happy in Jan's presence that I thought I could days just me and her and still be totally happy. And that thought scared me. I'd never thought about any one. Ever. I was trying to put it down to the excitement of a new sexual partner but sometimes I couldn't help but wonder. And then there was Jan herself – I thought about her almost constantly, as I said before. All her little quirks were so endearing and I couldn't help but grin at nearly everything she said. I noticed myself paying far too much attention to her reactions and caring far too much about them as well. This wasn't healthy.

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Codename: Wasp**

**10:00pm**

I walked up to Avengers Mansion with a very nervous Corrina.

"Everything's going to be fine – I mean, the Avengers will have to bring you up to speed on some things but otherwise it's just a good old reunion with – I'm sorry, I'm not helping am I?" I said, noticing that Corrina was going slower the closer we got the gate.

"It's been so long. What if… things are different?" she asked quietly, staring up at the tall building. I bit my lip, thinking of Hank. What if he someday wanted to reconcile? How would things have changed?– especially with Hawkeye now in the mix.

"Corrina, it seems you're all that has kept him going after what's happened to him. It seems nothing is different. Therefore everything will be fine." I said, hoping to sound as serious as I could without freaking her out. That is a tough tone to achieve. Somehow Hawkeye achieved it easily. Damn him.

We reached the front door and Corrina hesitated for a moment more before nodding to me to open the door. Michael stood in front of the Avengers, his chest till bare. Corrina entered quickly, her face set with determination.

"Michael?" she gasped. His face lit up with joy but there was still that deep fear. He gasped too.

"Corrina…" he said with reverence in his voice. "I…" he said nothing and ran towards her as she ran towards him. They reached one another and then held the other tightly. "I did it. I got back to you," I looked past them to Hawkeye, a sad smile on my lips. His face was hard to read and I looked down, the joy and sadness of Michael and Corrina's reunion still strong in my heart. Would mine and Hank's be like this?– if there ever was one, that is. Corrina pulled away from Michael and looked deep into his eyes.

"Michael… you've been gone almost two years. I… I thought you left. I… I thought you weren't coming back." She pulled him close once more and I ached to have Hawkeye holding me –

Wait – what? I wanted to be Hawkeye's arms… that wasn't right. I should want to be in Hank's arms, he's the one who…

'Who left? Who betrayed you? Who only gives a damn about bugs and science?' thought a sarcastic voice in my mind.

"Two years," said Michael, his voice full of regret. I watched on, my eyes still filled with sadness. I didn't see Hawkeye watching me, his face still unreadable.

"Michael, what happened to you?" asked Corrina and I silently begged him not to tell her – if I were her, it would break my heart to hear that. Michael's voice became dark.

"I will never let us be a part again, Corrina. I will never let them hurt me again – any of them," I made to step forward, in case he became hostile from memories again.

"Who?" said Corrina – that was when I cringed. You never asked who. Just like you never said it was easy. One of the rules in the 'hero book'. Just as I expected, weird green lights flashed and all of us tensed. And then we were joined by five strangers. (Okay, maybe not exactly like I expected but something was still bound to happen.)

Could this night get any weirder?

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**10:06 pm**

So… Michael and Corrina were reunited. That was pretty sweet. Then 5 weird alien guys teleported in to the Mansion… who we, the Avengers are now fighting against.

Not gunna lie, this raccoon guy is nuts.

"Ah-ugh-ah!" Jan cried and I spun around to see the guy with a metal face about to fire at her.

'No!' a voice in my head cried out. I immediately knocked an arrow and fired. Jan flew toward me and I prayed she was alright.

What the hell is wrong with me? I know Jan can take of herself.

The masked man fired at me and I jumped out the way – I saw Jan's wasp stings shot past me.

"Wasp – get Korvac and the girl out of here – AH!" cried Tony.

'Yes, Jan, please get out of here.' I thought, firing another two arrows. I heard Jan calling to the happy couple while her stings still flew overhead. Finally they stopped and I knew she was safer now.

**10:11 pm**

I raced into the kitchen, dodging this alien guy's bullets as I ran. I leapt over the bench, nearly hitting myself on the pans that hung above.

Why the hell are they there? Seriously, I mean we've got cup- You know what? Now is not the time.

I ducked down, drawing an arrow. Time to show this guy who he was screwing with. I looked up – maybe these stupid pans could come in useful. I watched carefully – woah, what? That guy just lifted his mask up- he's HUMAN?! Time to get some answers. I fired the arrow and heard it begin to do its job. I climbed back over the bench, smirking.

"You look pretty human for an evil alien." I said, pointing an arrow at the man sprawled on the ground beneath me. The way he was laying kind of reminded me of how Jan had looked the other night…

Again, not the time.

"Who are you? And what'd you want with Korvac?" I demanded, tightening my bow.

"I'm called Starlord and you have to listen to me. You have no idea who Michael Korvac is." I raised one eyebrow – Starlord, seriously? And who the hell is Michael Korvac?

**10:17 pm**

"Jan, wait!" I cried, running in with Starlord – turns out his story had been pretty weird. I figured I best take it up with the rest of the Avengers. I knew Jan wouldn't be happy about it though. I could tell just by the way she turned and looked me when I said her name. "You got to listen to what this guy's got to say," That was when I took in the rest of scene – Warlock was behind Jan, the girl and Korvac. The raccoon guy, Rocket, was in front, pointing a gun at Jan. I felt a distinct urge to flick the rodent into the water.

I need to get a handle on myself.

"Hawkeye, what are you doing?" said Iron Man as he emerged from the water with the Guardian girl over his shoulder.

"Just listen to him!" I said, half glaring at Tony.

"Korvac – he's a wanted fugitive. He's insane. He's wiped out thousands of sentient lives." I was still staring at Tony, half daring him to contradict. I didn't notice how close Jan still was to Korvac – Starlord had said he would lose control. Hulk then dropped down and again my attention was captured – plus I'd yet to figure out a way to get Jan away from him without sounding like a freak.

"I can't believe. I won't. Michael is the victim here." Said Jan, flying closer to him. That's when I saw it – those weird scars on his back? Well, yeah, they're glowing. I knew I was too late to get Jan away.

Oi, God – please let her be okay?

"He was abducted! Experimented on! He… Michael?" she said, pulling back. The man had begun to glow and I desperately wanted to grab Jan and run.

What has gotten into me?

Korvac was groaning, almost crying out. Jan continued to pull away from him but I knew she wouldn't be far enough away. I knew none of us would. Suddenly a wave of cosmic- it was cosmic, right? - cosmic energy exploded out from him and Jan dropped to the floor. The rest of followed too and I reached out my hand to catch her.

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Codename: Wasp**

**10:23 pm**

I woke up, groggy. The room was white, pure white. I hovered nervously.

"Iron Man? Hawkeye?" I said.

Oh god, Hawkeye. Was he okay? Where was he, actually? Then I'd work out if he was okay.

Then the dazzling whiteness disappeared and I was in Hank's empty lab. Hurt stabbed at me – I'd avoided the room ever since he left. I heard a grunting behind me and spun, ready to attack.

"Hulk!" I cried, seeing who it was. He got up slowly and the lab changed into a desert – I think near Las Vegas?

"I've been here." Hulk said. What did the change mean? Our surroundings changed again – to a jungle.

"This is not Wakanda." Said Panther. Hulk and I turned to see Panther and Hawkeye walking. One of the alien guys was lying on the floor. I resisted the urge to run to Hawkeye and make sure he was okay. I couldn't see any signs that he was injured.

"T'Challa," I said, to distract my eyes from Hawkeye. "Where are we? What's happening?" As I walked over, I felt someone's eyes train in on me and I glanced to Hawkeye. He was wearing a hard expression and I looked him over once more, now that I was closer.

"What the heck is going on here?" He said and suddenly we were in Tony's office.

The next minutes consisted of being told about a mind gem, Guardians of the Galaxy and Korvac – turns out I was wrong and Korvac was crazy. The team was never gunna let this go.

Finally Hawkeye asked a good question and we were back on track to catching Korvac.

**10:26 pm**

We arrived back to Earth to Korvac taunting Carol – fear immediately clutched at my heart but Tony blasted Korvac away and Carol seemed unharmed.

"Michael – we can help you! But you have to stop this." I said, flying close to him. Even though he'd done some terrible, no one else had seen the look in his eyes when I asked what happened to him.

"No. N-n-n-no. What they did to me – I won't let that happen again. Not to anyone. _Now_ I can stop them. I can feel the power inside of me," My god, this guy was getting creepy.

"Now!" cried Tony, firing with his repulsors. All of us, including the Guardians and Miss Marvel, joined together and fired. Korvac clenched his jaw and created a shield around.

I really need to get myself one of them.

Korvac once again sent us flying by expanding the energy around him but before he could properly recover Hulk and Groot attacked, breaking the shield. Tony jumped him, pinning him down.

"Korvac, we can protect you from the Kree if you stop fighting us." Korvac pushed Tony up so they were both standing.

"You LIE!" yelled Korvac. Hulk joined in Tony's struggle and I worried for my team mates. I glanced to Hawkeye and saw that his eyes were on me. I shot him a confused look.

"Warlock, now!" Tony cried, drawing my attention. Warlock jumped forward, the Soul Gem glowing. Korvac dropped us all again.

I've decided Tony needs to look into cosmic energy.

I sat up feebly and saw Korvac turn towards a sobbing Corrina.

"Corrina?" he said, his voice filled reverence again. It wasn't sweet anymore – it was scary. Not after I'd seen what this guy could do. I prepared to attack him if he showed the slightest hint of attacking Corrina.

"Please, Michael, stop." She said, backing away. "You're scaring me."

'That makes two of us.' I thought dryly.

"Scared? Of me?" said Korvac, approaching her. I tensed, ready to fire. "No, no, Corrina. I'm going to protect you. I'm doing all of this for you! To make the monsters go away!" his voice was aggressive by the end and my muscles tightened again while my stings flared.

"You're the only monster here, Michael." Corrina said, tears still falling. I gasped, an ache rocking through me. I knew how hard that must've been to say – she'd just got him back and it wasn't even him that was returned. Michael's power flared and the others tried to stop him while I stared at Corrina.

Michael was broken now. He was barely a threat.

I zoomed toward Corrina once the blinding light had receded. She had dropped to her knees, her face in her hands. I gripped her upper arms.

"Warlock, what happened?" I asked, mainly for the benefit of everyone else. Corrina had broken Michael, there wasn't much else to it.

"He sensed the woman's fear of him; her doubt in him. And despite all his power… all he truly wanted was to be with her." Carol walked to the other side of Corrina, her expression tender. My eyes flickered to Hawkeye for a moment. I knew my eyes would be filled with sorrow.

"Where is Korvac?" asked Tony to the silent group.

"I cannot sense him on this plane of existence." Said Warlock. Tony then began to talk about the Guardians and Avengers teaming up. Starlord shut him down – and rightly so, in my opinion.

I only had eyes for Hawkeye. I was emotionally exhausted after today – I wanted to be with him. Sex, movies, talking until we both fell asleep, I didn't care. I just wanted to be with him.

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**11:33 pm**

I lay in bed thinking over today. Today had been the first time since Jan and I had fought together against an enemy that had the ability to destroy one of us. And thought of Jan being destroyed scared the hell out of me. And I didn't know why.

Seriously, what was up with me?

Right now, all I wanted was to go that guest room, bash down the door and have her in my arms.

There was a soft, familiar knock at the door. I got up and crossed the room. I opened the door tiny amount and Jan flew in. Once I'd shut the door and turned around she was normal size again. We looked at each other for a moment before she jumped into my arms. Her legs were wrapped around my torso, her arms around my neck. My arms were tight around her waist and my face nuzzled into her shoulder.

"Jan, Jan, Jan," I murmured, inhaling her scent. I walked over to the bed and laid her down. She looked at me with sad eyes. "What is it?" I asked with concern. This was new for me – I'd never felt so worried about someone.

"Please?" she said and I knew what she meant. I leaned over and kissed her passionately. Her hands were already in my hair, one of her legs sliding up mine.

Jan needed a distraction and I was only too willing.


	4. Who Do You Trust

**See disclaimer in Chap 1 :)**

**Author Note:** _This chap covers the episodes 'Who Do You Trust?' and 'The Ballad of Beta-Ray Bill.' I'm s__o sorry for the late update! Life has become insanely hectic lately. There is a lot of emotion in this one and fighting feelings is coming up. There is a bit of cheesy-ness in there but I am putting it down to Valentines Day fever, ha ha. Enjoy and please review! :)x _

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**12:46 pm**

I lay awake in bed, listening to the thunder, lightning and rain outside. I loved thunderstorms – ever since my days in the circus. Mind you, when you lived in a tent or caravan it was a bit more exciting. I was alone in my bed – Jan had gone back to her newly renovated rooms tonight as the Captain was going to call early to train with her. I grinned in the darkness – maybe I would swing by and watch. Just to see if it made Jan nervous.

I'd noticed that around her lately – whenever we were with the other Avengers she got really nervous. Jan would knock things over, stumble over her words and once her eyes had even flickered to exit about three times in one sentence. I didn't know what to make of it. When it was just me and her, she was fine. Actually she was more than fine.

If you catch my drift.

Yes, I know I'm kind of perverted, let's move on.

I wanted to know if Jan got nervous when she was in battle – or training, in this instance. Super villains had been pretty quiet since the Guardians of the Galaxy left. We hadn't taken any one out due to Tony planning our next move against the Serpent Society.

Which I thought was pretty stupid.

The thunder clapped loudly and the lightning flashed. Suddenly my door flew open, even more light flooding my room. I sat up and door shut. I heard a familiar buzzing before Jan appeared, normal sized, beside my bed. Her eyes were wide with fear.

"You're scared of storms?" I asked, trying not to sound incredulous. She nodded. I pulled back the covers and she climbed in, immediately cuddling close to me. I wrapped my arms around her, enjoying the warmth from her slim form. Slowly her breathing calmed and I knew Jan was asleep. I leaned down awkwardly to kiss her forehead.

"Night, Waspy." I said before letting myself drift off into sleep.

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Codename: Wasp**

**8:37 pm**

"You're right. It was you. He said you were the Scroll, Clint." Clint, a shape-shifting alien? What? That's not possible. If he was that would mean I'd…

You know what? Let's just stick with it's impossible.

Clint turned, looking at me, Carol and Steve with half-wild eyes.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wasp was right, this is crazy. I've saved this team more times than I can count – I've helped save the world. I'm not some _alien._" Clint said, backing away from us. He then turned to Tony, advancing. I knew he was on dangerous ground with Iron Man now.

But I also knew that this was probably causing Clint to relive the moments when Widow had betrayed him. Except this time, it was more than one person. It was his entire team – everyone he had now was betraying him, in his eyes.

"Hawkeye, Clint. I need you to come with me." Said Carol and I knew she was getting into S.W.O.R.D. agent mode.

Really, Carol, now? This wouldn't help Hawkeye. Or his opinion of you.

"What are you talking about?" Clint said. I wanted to tell Carol to shut up but I knew even more would unravel if I did. So I held my tongue (not literally, that would be stupid) and waited, praying that neither Hawkeye nor Carol did something stupid.

"I may be an Avenger now but I'm also an agent of S.W.O.R.D. This is what we do. If Nick Fury thinks you're one of these Scrolls, I need to bring you in for interrogation. Those are the rules," Carol gripped Hawkeye's upper arm. He flinched away, instantly defensive. Yep, now you've done it, Carol. Hawkeye is going to lose his shit.

"Don't touch me." He spat, his eyes hardening. Carol slid into a defensive position, the Kree energy her body was infused with circling her fists. I wanted to face-palm.

"Don't make me do this the hard way Hawkeye. There are rules and without them-" Hawkeye knocked an arrow and pointed it at her face.

"You can stuff your rules, Major. I'm not going anywhere with you." I quickly shrunk and flew over, thinking I should intervene before someone gets hurt.

"Carol, stop this. Hawkeye's one of us." Wait, I was on Hawkeye's side in this fight? I saw Tony raise his hand, the small reactor glowing on his palm.

"So much for 'Avengers Assemble.'" Murmured Hawkeye and a slight amount of pain his voice was evident.

No one was going to listen – I could feel it. We were going to fall apart. The Avengers was done.

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**11:29 pm**

I knocked softly on Jan's door, my heart pounding. She opened it, wearing some tracksuit pants and loose jumper. She took one look at my face before grabbing my forearm and pulling me inside. Jan shut the door quickly. We stared at each other for a moment and I took a step forward, my hands reaching out to her. Jan pulled me in close to her, our bodies melding together. My head rested on her shoulder and my breathing shuddered. I pulled back to look at her.

"You know I'm not. You know I'm me. I am, Jan, I promise. I'm me." My voice was slightly hysterical and I looked deep in her eyes.

"Shh, shh." Jan said, holding me again. "I know, Clint. I know."

"Thank you, thank you." I kissed up her neck, across her cheek to her lips. I kissed her passionately, one of my hands in her hair, the other pressing on the small of her back. Her arms wrapped around my neck and she stood on tiptoe. My hands moved to her arse, squeezing it tightly.

Best thing about sleeping with agents or heroes – their bodies are amazing. I'm materialistic too. Deal with it.

She pressed her pelvis forward and I knew she would feel my cock straining about my suit. She smiled against my lips and began to walk backward to her bed. I stopped kissing her so I could make sure we didn't fall. Her lips immediately began kissing my neck and I pressed hard against her. We fell back on her bed and I quickly claimed her lips again. She pulled away and I looked down at her with concern.

"I could see it in your eyes." She murmured and my look changed to confusion. "I could see it – your fear of being betrayed. It was like Widow all over again, wasn't it?" I felt my throat constrict and nodded, fighting my emotions.

'Turn into the soldier, Clint. Turn into the soldier.' I thought, trying to bring the analytical, unfeeling part of myself to the forefront. I looked away from Jan, my eyes burning.

"Clint," said Jan, her hand turning my face back to hers. "I won't ever betray you." I looked deep into her blue eyes, my heart racing.

"I- I know. I won't betray you either." Panic raced through me as I looked at Jan. She had a small smile on her lips.

I had almost said that I loved her.

I didn't love her, did I? She was just Jan. My fuck buddy and in a weird way, my best mate. I couldn't be in love with her. Things hadn't worked out between me and Widow, why should Jan and I be any different? Things wouldn't be. Things would fall apart and I would be lost again.

Jan kissed me again, less heated than before. It was sweet, honest. And I couldn't help it – I kissed her back.

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Codename: Wasp**

**5:30 pm**

I buzzed around the Mansion, pondering Hawkeye's strange behaviour over the last few days. Something was up and he wasn't telling what. It had all started after Tony accused him of being an alien. Hawkeye had come to me, needing reassurance. I had willingly provided – I didn't want Hawkeye to be hurt. And now he was barely speaking to me. We trained together a couple of times and he had held back. We'd had no movie nights, no gaming nights and no sex. We only trained and even then, the sessions were short and Hawkeye hardly fought back. Something was definitely wrong.

"Miss Van Dyne, the telephone for you." Said JARVIS. I stopped and returned to normal size. A phone appeared out of one of the secret cavities in the Mansions walls. It wasn't ringing and I paused before reaching out and picking it up.

"Hello?" I said cautiously.

"Miss Van Dyne?" said an unfamiliar voice.

"Yes, who is this?" I asked. No one ever called me – I lived with the people who would and we communicated through our ID cards.

"This is Jeremy Cox. I'm with the local police. There's been a break in at your pent house apartment. We're still checking over everything but it seems as though nothing was taken. We need to come over so we can clear all the paper work."

"Oh, my god. Yes, okay. I'll be there soon." I said, shocked. How could someone have broken in? My place had the best security – Tony had even upgraded it for me last month. This, to me, smelt of super villain.

"Thank you." I hung up and put the phone down.

"JARVIS, tell Tony that I've got to go my apartment. Surely you were listening to the phone call - explain it to him. I don't know when I'll be back. I'll probably stay the night. Thanks." I busted open the nearest window and flew out, heading down the quickest route.

**5:37 pm**

I entered my apartment cautiously. There were no police men, no paperwork. I walked further in, my stings encircling my hands. I entered the kitchen and gasped. On the dinner table was a red tablecloth with two places set. Candles littered the room and were the only things providing the light. A single red rose sat in the centre of the table with a bottle of wine and two glasses next to it.

"Ah, Miss Van Dyne. So glad you could make it." Said the same voice that had been on the phone. I spun defensively to see Hawkeye standing there in black suit pants and crisp white shirt. I gasped.

"You- you-" I said, unable to comprehend what was going on.

"I know." He said speaking normally again and I stopped gaping. "There are a couple of outfits on your bed – I didn't know what you would come over in. If you want to go and pick one I'll get dinner on the table." Clint crossed the room, his dress shoes clicking on the floor slightly. My eyes followed him across the room, my feet glued to the floor. "Jan?" Hawkeye said.

"Right, right," I cried, miniaturising and flying from the room. I heard Clint chuckle softly.

**5:45 pm**

I entered the kitchen/dining room in a tight red dress that Hawkeye had left on my bed. As he looked up, his eyes widened and I felt my heart race. Nerves tingled through me and I bit my bottom lip. Why did I continue to get nervous around him? Clint crossed the room, stopping in front of me. He picked up my hand and kissed the back of it, his eyes never leaving mine.

"Dinner's served." He murmured, sexily. I nodded and led me to the table.

Our evening passed quickly, our friendly and flirty banter carrying the conversation easily. I had Hawkeye shoot wine out of his nose from one of my jokes and I nearly choked on my pasta at one of his. After dinner, he led me to the lounge.

"JARVIS, if you will." He said.

"You had JARVIS installed?" I demanded. He shook his head, looking at me with confusion.

"No, Tony did - when he redid the security." I nodded as some slow music came on. Hawkeye moved my arms so they were on his shoulder and his arms wrapped around my waist. Then he slowly became to dance with me, his eyes not leaving mine. My heart raced and I felt as though I couldn't breathe. No one had ever done anything like this for me. Ever. And I never expected Hawkeye to do something like this.

I'd never pegged him as the romantic type.

We danced for about three songs – the second was my favourite and the third was Hawkeyes. Neither were suited for the type of dancing we were doing but neither of us cared. Hawkeye occasionally kissed me throughout the songs and each of the kisses was tender. When the last song finished, Hawkeye stopped moving and simply looked into my eyes.

"Want to go upstairs?" he said, eyes alight with mischief. I grinned.

"Just give me a minute." I pulled away from the heaven that was his arms and made my way upstairs.

Thank goodness Clint hadn't found this draw. I pulled on the lace chemise I had.

"Agent Barton." I called. Hawkeye made his way upstairs with a confused look on his face. When he saw me at the door his jaw fell open. He practically ran up the stairs and yanked me into his arms, kissing me passionately.

"Oh, Jan…" he said, reverence in his voice. I blushed.

"Clint…" I murmured, not quite sure where I was going with this. He looked at my face, tearing his eyes from my body. "Tonight was amazing." I finally settled on saying. Clint smiled and kissed me.

**9:30 am**

I lay in bed, listening to Clint making coffee in the kitchen. I thought about what I wanted to say to Clint last night.

I hadn't wanted to say that I love him. But that can't be right. I can't be in love with Clint. He's my best friend. He's my fuck buddy. I can't fall in love with him. I'd fallen in love with Hank and he was my best friend and that didn't work out, did it? I couldn't screw this up with Hawkeye.

I couldn't lose him too.


	5. Nightmare In Red

**See disclaimer in chap 1 :)**

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**1:23 pm**

I relaxed in Banner's stupid boat, letting myself be warmed by the sun. Thoughts of Jan filled my head. I hadn't been able to think about anything else since our night in her apartment. The way she had looked in that red dress… when we danced… that chemise all tight around her body… I shifted uncomfortably; feeling suddenly aware of the man I was sharing the small space with.

"What is it now, Hawkeye?" asked Bruce wearily. He turned to look at me, frustration on his face.

"Nothing, just thinking." I replied, eager to move on from those thoughts.

"Why are you uncomfortable about what you're thinking of?" he said, quietly and suddenly I longed to have someone know about Jan and I and about how I thought I felt about her. That was when I made up my mind – Jan wouldn't care right? I mean, I could trust Bruce – and the Hulk.

"It's just… have you ever been in love Bruce? But with someone that you can't possibly be with because everything would be totally screwed up if you were." I said in a rush. Banner looked at me with confusion. "I think I love this girl but I can't love her and she can't love me – not that she does – because if we are together, everything will get screwed up. Even more so than it already is." Bruce nodded and remained silent for a moment.

"Is it Widow?" he asked and I froze. I hadn't thought about Widow since Hank (ew) had left the message for the Avengers. I then realised I hadn't answered but Bruce has continued. "… I would say tell her, whoever it is. No matter what the repercussions are, at least she knows and you'll get some closure. Otherwise you'll always be wondering what could have happened." I nodded and Bruce turned back to fishing rod.

I knew what would happen between Jan and I though – I knew we could work together, for some time at least. It would be like we are now, except I would be able to hold her hand and kiss her forehead. She would be able to snuggle into my arms and rest her head on my chest. I would be able to plan more romantic evenings for us – and in more public places. I wanted to be able to take Jan out and say to the world (and Hank and Widow, in some weird way) "look at this beautiful woman that is mine."

I knew that would never happen though… Jan was probably still caught up on Hank. I lay back down, my shoulders tensed uncomfortably. I might as well get over Jan as best I could without ruining what we had.

Damn feelings; they get in the way of everything.

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Codename: Wasp**

**3:50 pm**

Captain American and I raced to the Mansion. The Red Hulk (as we had dubbed him) had left the Helicarrier and we thought it best to get back to the Mansion and protect Bruce. Hawkeye hadn't been in touch and I immediately worried for him.

I had been thinking like this quite a bit lately – always over thinking about Hawkeye. I refused to admit to what I had thought the night in my apartment but my mind was still focused on Hawkeye most of the time. I got nervous when he entered the room, when he spoke to me, when he even looked at me when I was speaking. Sometimes I wanted to leave, run away from whatever my mind was doing but I couldn't leave the Avengers. The world needs us and truth be told, I loved working with these people. I couldn't imagine life any other way. Even if Hawkeye was confusing the crap out of me.

We arrived at the Mansion to find the place trashed. I immediately looked for Hawkeye while Cap' scouted for Banner. I flew to the main lounge to see Hawkeye, sprawled on the floor unconsciously. Fear clutched at my heart.

"Hawkeye!" I gasped. Thank god Cap' was elsewhere. I dropped to my knees beside him, feeling for pulse. There were small puffs of air coming from his nose but I had to feel his heart beating to be sure – I didn't trust myself when it came to this. There it was and I breathed a sigh of relief. Then it suddenly hit me – what I'd done, how I'd reacted. I jumped up.

"Cap'!" I called out before bobbing back down next to Hawkeye. I shook him gently. Captain America appeared beside me. "Clint." I said- there was no reaction. "Clint!" I repeated, a little more forcefully. His eyes fluttered and the hope in my heart fluttered right along with them. "Clint, wake up." His eyes opened and I pulled back. "You okay, tough guy?" I said, not sure where the tough guy came from. Clint stumbled to his feet, exclaiming about Banner.

"Easy," murmured Cap'. I held onto Hawkeye, praying he didn't fall. I wished I could stop feeling so overly concerned for him. It would make fighting together a whole lot easier. I watched him with worry as we planned our next move. He seemed okay and I forced it to the back of my mind, hoping it would stay there.

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**11:25 pm**

I entered my room to find Jan sitting on my bed, holding her shoulder. I looked at her for a moment. She looked up, her eyes filled with hurt.

"Hulk's gone. IronMan, T'Challa, Carol, Hank. They're all gone. I'm injured. Cap' has been acting weird. You're, like, the only one left, Clint. Everything's falling apart." She murmured. I crossed the room – the only thing that registered in her sentences was that she was hurt.

"Is it your shoulder?" I asked, sitting beside her. She nodded, her eyes filling with tears. I pulled Jan into my arms. "It's going to be okay. I'll call Jane and she can look at your arm, okay? Everything will work- trust me, okay?" I felt her nod and felt like an idiot for saying 'okay' so much then.

"Can I sleep in here tonight?" she asked – it had been a while since we'd slept in the same bed. It'd been a while since we'd done anything. Namely because I was scared my feelings would show themselves in some manner. But I couldn't leave Jan alone, not when she was upset like this. So I agreed and we soon got comfortable in bed, after arguing over the movie for about 15 minutes.

Jan fell asleep soon after it started. A romance scene came on and I ached. I wanted to tell Jan so badly. I thought about what I would say to her…

I shut my eyes, letting the scene play out in my mind. I'd admitted it to myself. I loved Jan and there was nothing I could do about it except hope that one day she would feel the same.

The sounds of the movie washed over me as I drifted to sleep.

**11:37 am**

I walked into the kitchen in the Mansion, my eyes still half shut.

"It can't be healthy to be awake this early on a Sunday." I grumbled to myself, reaching for a coffee mug.

"Morning Hawkeye." Said Jan, sounding to be in a similar state to me. I sipped my coffee, the sweet liquid filling me.

"Mmm," I said, the scent filling my nostrils.

Yes I am like a chick when I drink coffee. After growing up in a circus and functioning on the helicarrier for a lot of the time, coffee was sparse. At Starks house it was plentiful and good. Finally.

"I'm good thanks." Jan snapped, stalking off with her coffee.

"Uh, what?" I said, finally registering what she'd said. She turned and looked at me with hard eyes.

"I understand you have a separate love affair with coffee but I'd still appreciate being noticed when I say good morning." She snapped again and before I could say anything more she had swept from the kitchen. I stared at the door for a second, thinking over why Jan would be so pissed at me over something little like that. Not even two weeks ago she was joking that one day I'd leave her for coffee.

I had been avoiding our relationship lately – I mean, we shared a bed a few nights ago but that had been it. Namely because I could picture myself expressing my feelings in some manner. And I didn't want to do this. It was just a crush – I know I had said love but it's a little early for that. I hoped the crush would go away soon – Jan clearly wasn't going to wait for me to get over it forever.

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Code name: Wasp**

**12:15 pm**

"Stupid Hawkeye." I spat punching the bag in front of me. Cap' had let me use one of his, knowing I wouldn't destroy it like he could. I wasn't usually one for hand to hand combat – I mean, I can throw a decent punch but otherwise I use my stings – but my current emotions called for it. Hawkeye was acting distant-sy and I was not okay with it. And I'm not okay with not being okay with it.

I continued to punch and kick the shit out of the bag, not really using a routine. I span, ducked and dodged an imaginary partner in the vicinity of the bag.

"You're so all over the place." Came a familiar voice and my fist slammed into the bag twice as hard. "Want to spar?" said Hawkeye. I said nothing, still pounding at the bag. As I pulled back Hawkeye grabbed my elbow. I snapped my arm up, hoping my fist would hit him in the face. He dodged, letting go and I spun in a flurry of blows. Hawkeye tried to fight back but I was too angry to give him much of a chance. My body hurt from attacking the bag earlier but I still gave my attack on him my all. As I tired, he fought back and I struggled to defend myself. Our bodies pressed tight against each other before we danced away, deciding on our next attack.

Soon we were both almost spent – Hawkeye was becoming careless and I could only defend half-heartedly. I made to punch Hawkeye but he grabbed my fist, lifting my arm up. He yanked me forward, his arm going around my waist. His lips crashed against mine and I stopped being angry and hurt.

I just focused on kissing Clint. We hadn't kissed like this in a while and I'd missed it so much. The way he dominated just a little… the way his lips tugged on mine, just like the first time he kissed me…

"Want to hit the shower?" he gasped as our lips broke a part.

"God yes," I said, loving the way his body was so close to mine I could feel his eager cock on my thigh.

**Name: Clint Barton  
Code name: Hawkeye**

**6:39 pm**

So, shower sex with Jan was good.

As always.

She had gone to ask Cap' what he was doing for dinner. If he had other plans, we were going to become chefs. With the help of JARVIS, of course.

Jan burst through the kitchen door, causing me to nearly fall off my chair. She giggled at me and I shot her look.

"Sorry," she laughed and I couldn't help it- I laughed with her. "Cap said he was fine with fending for himself so… let the cooking begin." Jan danced over to me and pulled me from the chair. She spoke to JARVIS, asking him what we would need. I didn't know what we were making but I followed hers and JARVIS' orders while Jan buzzed around me.

It was when we were plating up our meal that I realised what I'd been cooking. It was my favourite meal – I'd told Jan about it weeks ago. I looked up at her with wide eyes. She had a forkful half raised to her mouth (which was open) when she realised I was staring at her.

"What?" she said, remaining in the position. I laughed and shook my head.

This whole 'getting-rid-of-my-crush' thing definitely wasn't going to be easy.

**7:45 pm**

"Avengers Assemble." Mine and Jan's cards beeped and Carol's voice rang out.

"Why is she getting us assemble? Didn't she quit?" I spat while Jan jumped up.

"Can it, Hawkeye. Clearly something's up. Let's go – I'll get changed while you get Cap'," Jan buzzed from the room and I sighed.

'Bloody Avengers.' I thought, getting up.

**2:16 am **

Wasp and I flew toward the battle that was raging in the distance. Wakandan guns were firing and Hulk's roars could be heard. Miss Marvel flew overhead.

We reached the scene to see me about to fire at one of the Black Panthers – wait, what?

I did the first thing I could think – loosed an arrow at the fake Hawkeye. The shock ran through him and he dropped to the floor. The caped Panther jumped out of the way. Jan and I flew down and I fired a few more times.

"Avengers Assemble- but only the human ones." Said Jan and I held in my laugh.

The battle raged - I focused on the other Hawkeye and Ant-man. Namely because I hate people in personating me and Hank is total arse. But moving on-

I heard the two Jan's talking to Carol – for once I agreed with Miss Marvel – how do we know who's who?

I faced off with the other Hawkeye – I fired an arrow then darted out of the way, fired and moved out of the way. I saw the fake Thor fall and Carol rush to his aid. Did she not see the hammer? It was cracked and frazzling, clearly a sign that they were fakes.

Thor rolled over and was green. Green. The caped Panther walked over with the other one and ripped off his mask. He was green too, with weird ears sticking out of its head. Carol growled and the Kree energy covered her clenched fists. Before she could attack, IronMan took her out with a blast from his main arc reactor. Panther, Wasp and I raced over to her.

"Destroy them all." Said IronMan and the rest of the 'Avengers' slid into defensive positions.

"T'Challa, I'm sorry." Said Carol, being helped up by the same man she was addressing. "I didn't know. I didn't know what to do." T'Challa was calm as he replied:

"I assume you do now."

"Oh, yeah." Said Carol, her entire body glowing with Kree energy.

Carol totally lost her shit. She went mental – she even took down the Hulk.

Wasp's stings rained down on Captain America. She then attacked Hank. He threw a punch her way and it took all of my self-control to run over there and beat the living shit out of him. Jan grew and landed on the ground, her fist colliding with Hank's face.

"That felt kind of good." She called.

'It felt good to watch too.' I thought, firing an arrow.

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Codename: Wasp**

**2:22 am**

All of the Skrull-Avengers lay in the wet grass. I stood with Hawkeye and Carol while Panther looked to his city. Hawkeye began blabbing about needing to be in New York and Panther claimed he had to remain here. Carol put her two cent's worth in and I simply stood there, my shoulder aching. All I wanted was to see Jane and then to sleep.

But I knew that wasn't an option – I had to keep going, to save the world. I shook a little and Hawkeye glanced over his shoulder to me, concern on his face. Carol was trying to convince Panther to come and fight with us. I tried to ignore Hawkeye's eyes on my face and listen to Carol. But I couldn't help but feel joy that he was worried about me.

Panther decided to stay in Wakanda and I swear, Hawkeye was going to rip his head off. So Carol and I got him out of there fast.

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**2:43 am**

"Jan, you need to sleep. We won't be back home for like half an hour so have a nap, god damn it." I said, following Jan to the resting bay on the Quin Jet.

"Why don't you have a nap, Clint? You're obviously whinier than me." Jan rubbed her arm and I worried.

"Says the injured one." I motioned to her shoulder, showing her that I'd noticed her subtle movements signally pain. Since working with Widow (who was like a rock when it came to emotion) I'd learnt to pick up on these things. Jan bit her lip, eyeing the comfortable bed Tony had had installed. "I'll be here when you wake up." I said coaxingly. Jan nodded, her body making the decision her mind couldn't. She walked over to the bed and crawled under the covers. "I'll wake you when we're five minutes out."

"Ten." She said, pulling the covers up. "Ten minutes out." She clarified before I could question. I nodded and gently kissed her forehead, praying that Miss Marvel didn't walk in.

I stayed with Jan, messaging Miss Marvel through my ID card. I told her I might try and catch some sleep too, hence why I was staying with Jan. She said she'd wake me if something happened. I sat on the bed opposite Jan's, watching her peaceful expression. I wished, once more, that I could tell her. And more than that, I wished I could keep her safe from the aliens threatening our planet. But I knew she wouldn't listen to my words of caution. She never listened to me. I looked down, thinking to the night after we fought Red Hulk.

"You're all I have, y'know." I said to the sleeping woman, unsure of where I was going with this. "You're my rock now. I've never let myself be so attached to someone. It's scaring me Jan. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have you. Please, stay with me? Forever? We can get married one day and once we're too old for the Avengers we'll go to the West Coast. Like I said when that Ancient Winters of Asgard thing happened. I don't know what I'd do without you, Jan. I think… I think I love you. More than I've ever loved any one, ever." I paused, glancing to the door. Miss Marvel better not be listening. "I love you, Waspy." I murmured. "I hope maybe one day you'll love me too."


	6. Secret Invasion

**See disclaimer in chap 1 :)  
**

**Author Note:** _Hello! I just want to say that I hope you're enjoying the story :) And if you could/want to, please like my madam-may fanfiction facebook page. The link is on my profile. There will be new chapter updates there as well as possible story ideas. I do use it for some photography work but it is generally fanfiction/writing based stuff. Please check it out and please review this chapter! And just in case you were wondering - things are far from over in this story... ;)x _

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Codename: Wasp**

**9:27 am**

"We need to call IronMan. We need to bring in Hank and the Fantastic Four and-"

"And what?" snapped Hawkeye, turning in his seat to look at me.

"And if they help us then they're the good guys!" I cried, panic filling me. It felt like I couldn't breathe, my heart was racing. I wanted out – out of this seat, out of this Quin Jet. I wanted to be fighting – to be stopping this from happening.

Light flashed and the jet plummeted to the ground. We came to a stop after spinning uncontrollably – Carol busted through the window and we all jumped out.

Me, Carol and Hawkeye.

Up against an invasion of aliens.

This should be fun.

We looked around, worrying where everyone was. Hawkeye gasped and I spun, ready to protect him. I followed his gaze upward to a foreign ship flying above.

Let's scratch the fun part shall we?

**9:34 am**

I fought my arse off, shooting every Skrull I could see when suddenly a hand grabbed me. I screamed as the electricity raced through me. I fell to the floor once the Skrull opened his hand. I didn't have the strength to fly.

Carol, Hawkeye and I were all dragged to the steps nearby where Captain America and some more Skrulls stood. I was dazed and confused – what the hell was Cap' doing?

"No," I managed to blurt out. Hawkeye leant forward, his arms trapped in the hands of the alien holding him.

"You," he spat. "All this time you were the Skrull." The Skrull-Captain America smirked and Hawkeye lost it. He broke free of the Skrulls hold on him and ran forward. Before he could reach Captain America the Thor-Skrull hit him with some lightning. Clint fell to the ground and I held in my scream. My heart, however, was aching and I couldn't work out why.

The Skrulls then forced one of the camera men to record Cap – I couldn't focus though. My eyes were riveted to Clint who was kneeling in front of the Skrull in pain. I longed to break free and rush to his aid, kicking all of the alien's butts in the process.

I suddenly couldn't stand to see Hawkeye in pain.

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**9:46 am**

I stood, back in the Skrull's hand with Jan and Carol, listening to the Mockingbird-Skrull babble about how the Captain America-Skrull was going to deliver the earth to her. That's when I heard a voice I never thought I would – the real Captain America's.

Or at least who I hoped was the real Captain America.

Then a shot of purple ray-energy-stuff (remember where I grew up) came from the sky, causing the Skrull's to drop like fly's. IronMan landed next to Cap' and more hope flooded through me, no matter how much I tried to stop it.

"Let the people see you now." Came Tony's strong voice. I looked back to the Skrull's and saw that they were green.

The Mockingbird-Skrull continued the normal banter of villain that all of us had heard a thousand times before. Lightning then ripped through their ship and the surrounding area.

"Is that so, creature?" came Thor's booming voice. "Avengers Assemble!" I heard Jan's little squeal of joy as Thor raised Mjlinir.

Once the Skrull ship had fallen into the water, Thor went nuts – Mjlinir ripped through all the Skrull's, knocking them to the ground.

I stood with my back Miss Marvel, regretting my choice of partner. Jan and I would have had much more fun. A Skrull launched itself at us and Carol took it down.

"Are we even now?" she spat. I almost laughed in her face.

"No!" I cried, losing an arrow at the Ant Man-Skrull that was about to jump her. Jan zipped past the both of us, firing like crazy. It seemed none were safe from her stings. Then the Panther-Spider Man-Skrull caught her. I paused, waiting to see if I should fire when yellow light flared from his hands.

He opened them and Jan jumped out, returning to her normal size. She fired at him and I grinned. She was good.

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Codename: Wasp**

**9:58 am**

A ringing filled the air and I clamped my hands over my ears. Hawkeye did the same next to me and I drunkenly flew close to him. I saw IronMan be taken down yet he yelled something at Thor who quickly took off.

'Fix it!' I wanted to scream. My eyes streamed and Hawkeye cowered beside me. That hurt more than the ringing.

The sound stopped and I breathed a sigh of relief. I looked at Hawkeye, my eyes filled with concern. He merely nodded and stooped to pick up his bow. I wanted to stop him, to hold him.

Then I realised what I was thinking and snapped out of it, focusing on the matter at hand. The two Captain America's battled it out, Carol and IronMan took out some of the Super Skrulls, I zapped one of them till he fell to the ground, Thor summoned the lightning from above and fried the remaining Skrulls as Cap delivered the death blow to Skrull-Captain America.

The Queen ran from Thor, hoping to escape. We blocked her path and panic filled her eyes. She began to babble about the prophecies once more before Carol shot her.

"Write that." She snapped. I grinned.

**12:51 pm**

I'd just got in the shower, the water soothing my aching muscles. Since we had to find out how the rest of the world was doing and how the clean-up was going to go, shower time had been pushed back.

But now I was finally in heaven. Steam filled the space and the scent of my shampoo was intensified because of it. Then suddenly the curtain was pulled open and I jumped around, covering the appropriate areas.

"Oh please." Said Clint, looking worse for wear. He stepped in; sweat still covered most of his body. He stepped under the warm spray, moaning as the water hit him. I was immediately reminded of all the times I'd made him make that sound. I smiled and slid my arms around him, our wet bodies rubbing against each other. He moaned again and I knew it was because of me this time. He spun, his hands running down my back. He spun us so I was under the water – I tilted my head back, letting the water wash the shampoo from my hair. I heard Hawkeye murmur something and I looked at him with confusion. He kissed me, our bodies pressing together, the water causing new friction. Clint then pulled away and I almost whimpered, not wanting him to stop. "I'll let you enjoy your shower, Waspy."

My eyes narrowed as he quickly opened the curtain. I shot a gentle zap at his bum before he could escape me. I giggled at his exclamation of "ow!"

**10:30 am**

I relaxed in the bath, candles lit, soft music playing. I sighed, eyes closed. My thoughts immediately drifted to Hawkeye. He was out helping Cap' and IronMan move the villains to a more secure set up. I'd offered to go with them but Hawkeye had 'accidently' let slip that I'd hurt my shoulder in Wakanda. IronMan then forbid me from helping and had JARVIS schedule an appointment with Jane.

I had almost shot Hawkeye.

But I knew his heart was in the right place and I probably couldn't afford to injure myself more if something went wrong today. And knowing that some members of the Serpent Society were involved it probably would.

The only downside to this was that my worry was sky-rocketing. I was freaking out because Hawkeye was gone and I wasn't there to help him if something went wrong.

And in some weird way, I missed him. Quite a bit. I really wanted to curl up in one of our beds and watch some movies.

"Miss Van Dyne," said JARVIS. "There has been a cave-in in the city. Captain America, Spiderman, the prisoners and a number of civilians are trapped below. Hawkeye is on the scene and Ironman and Thor are on their way. IronMan requested you be brought up to date but that you remain in the Mansion." I sat up, water going everywhere.

Tony wanted me to stay _in the mansion_ when the people I love were _in danger?_

"JARVIS I'm going to that cave-in." I said, standing and reaching for my towel.

"All of the doors have been locked and all window access is denied. There is no way you can get out." JARVIS said a matter of fact-ly. I growled.

Damn Tony. Damn the bloody Avengers.

"Fine. When is my appointment with Jane?" I snapped, pulling on my robe, my towel hanging on the warmed rack.

"11:20 am. She said she may get here early though." JARVIS supplied. I nodded and left the bathroom. I sighed, even more worry rocking through me. Worry for the Captain – the public and press were giving him a hard enough time at the moment. Worry for IronMan and Thor, going into danger unknown. And most of all worry for Clint. I knew he would keep his cool though – there would a myriad of sarcastic comments, with some swearing involved but everyone would be safe. He would keep them all safe.

'Just like he is keeping you safe by making you stay here and see Jane,' said a sudden voice in my head. I stopped, pausing at my door.

Why was Clint doing that? Why would he care so much? I mean, sure we slept together and we were close but there was nothing there – was there?

I shook myself and walked into my room. Slowly I planned my outfit, thinking of when Hawkeye got home.

Wait, what was I doing? Was I planning my outfit _because_ of Hawkeye? I couldn't – that would – I used to – I used to do that for Hank – I couldn't be doing that for Clint…

I thought back to the night when Clint had surprised me in my apartment – the night I had wanted to say that I loved him. I had pushed that memory away, forced myself not to think about that night. I couldn't love Hawkeye.

I finished getting dressed and sat at my dressing table, brush in hand. The simple rhythmic movement soon allowed my mind to wander…

Sadly it went to Clint and my heart raced. I thought about all the things he'd ever done for me, I thought about all the things we'd done together – all the sex, all the movie and game nights, all the workout sessions – and how much I trusted him. He truly was my best friend.

I'd lost one best friend – I couldn't lose another one.

I couldn't love Clint.

**9:02 pm**

"I will repeat the derogative: where is location of Captain America's shield? Tell me or be destroyed." The weird robot man opened his fist and I tried to sit up. My body ached from how his hand had clamped around my body.

"Not… gunna happen…" I tried to spit out. My breath was still shaky and I could almost feel bruises appearing. The green and yellow guy looked at me strangely before his hand clamped around me again. He swung me and I felt dizziness hit me. Then suddenly something a lot worse than dizziness hit me – it felt as if he had slammed his hand against a concrete wall.

"Stop! Please!" I heard Jane yell as unconscious tried to take over me. "Please don't hurt her. They took the shield to Africa. To Wakanda." I felt worry grip me just as much as the pain was – don't send this guy to Africa – Hawkeye was there. Clint could get hurt. This guy was serious trouble. "Now, let her go." Jane's voice was shaky but strong. Sisterly love for her suddenly erupted – we needed to get this chick some super powers.

I felt myself move and the hand unfurled from around me. I fell to the ground with a dull thud. I had no energy or will power to get up. I barely heard the green and yellow guy as he listed off his mission objectives. (Had I been paying more attention then I might have saved the guys a lot of trouble… best we don't tell them that.)

Then suddenly, everything ripped and tore around me and Jane screamed. I wished for Hawkeye, wished for him to come and save me. I wanted scream for him to come and help us, to come and help me.

And then I blacked out.

**9:16 am**

The heavy blackness that had engulfed me lifted. I coughed out the dust in throat and lungs, my body still aching with bruises. I looked around – part of the Mansion was destroyed.

Tony was going to be pissed.

"You had me worried there." Said Jane, leaning over me. Her blue eyes were wide and I knew she would have been panicking.

I couldn't think of that though. I had my team to worry about.

"Cap'." I said, dumbly. "We've got to warn Cap'." I tried again. My fist glowed with energy as I grew to normal size. Jane looked at me with confusion while I pulled out my ID Card. I had to get in contact with them, I just had to.

I needed to know that Hawkeye was okay.

Wait, what?

"Cap'? Can you hear me? Is anybody there? Thor? Black Panther? Anyone?" I began to panic when no one answered. What happened to them?

**Name: Clint Barton  
Code name: Hawkeye**

**4:23 pm**

"Wasp." I said pulling out my ID Card. "Hawkeye."

"Clint- you good?" came her worried voice. I wanted to smile at her caring but I kept my cool.

"Always. I found your Vision guy – just dropped a big rock on him… And, it didn't do anything to him at all." My voice lost its casual cockiness as the Vision walked out of the rock, completely unharmed. "Great." I sighed. Jan would be hearing this – she would know I was in danger. I worried for her – knowing her loyalty to the team she might be going a little crazy right now.

I hoped her loyalty to me was a little bigger and she might be going a little more crazy too.

Why do I think these things? Especially at times like this…

My bow disappeared from my hand and rage flooded through me.

"You're gunna pay for that." I lunged at the guy, punching, kicking – but to no avail. I paused, waiting to see he would attack. His fists collided with me and I flew toward the steps. My back cracked as I smashed into them and I let out a gasp of pain.

I couldn't move.

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Code name: Wasp**

**5:34 pm**

I sat with Jane, bandaging her arm. There was no scary movie this time, no popcorn. Just the destroyed bit of the Mansion and us.

The boys had returned (with Black Panther) and were currently telling IronMan what happened – the Mansion thing and what happened in Wakanda.

"Jane, I know you're a paramedic and all. And you're totally fearless which is so awesome but maybe you should really think twice about dating a super hero. It might be bad for your health. Really bad." I emphasised. Jane looked away, eyes sad.

"Thank you Jan." she said before getting up and walking away. I sat quietly by myself in the dark.

I'd never felt so alone or cold before. Hank was gone – Hulk was still locked up. IronMan was sorting out his issues. Panther was now back but he was a difficult one to talk to. Steve was still somewhat dealing with the repercussions of the Skrull's actions. Carol was off doing S.W.O.R.D. business, still dealing with the clean up after the Skrull invasion. And Thor could have to disappear to Asgard at any random time.

Clint and I seemed the only permanent members of the team. But even he sometimes acted weird around me.

I shut my eyes as emotion I wasn't prepared to deal with hit me. I felt so alone. Tears seeped out from under my lashes.

I don't know how long I sat there, silently crying, tears streaming. I shivered from the cold air, my body shaking with pain and sobs. I sat there, re-evaluating everything and finally facing the one thing I couldn't before.

My feelings for Hawkeye.

Clearly, I liked him more than a friend. And we definitely didn't have a brother-ly/sister-ly bond. That left only one alternative, an alternative that had crept up on me and shown its face out of nowhere.

I was in love with him.

My worry for him, my enjoyment of his caring for me. Our secret little moments – my remembering his favourite meal despite him only talking about it once. Only Clint knew about my chemise and about some of my other dirty secrets. But he also knew about my other secrets.

Little things about my childhood that didn't really seem important. Stupid stuff about video games that no one else would care about.

I had to admit it to myself.

'You love him,' said a quiet voice in my mind.

It's true – I'm in love with Clint Barton.

I am fucking screwed.

"Hey you," came his voice. I looked up to see Clint cautiously making his way through the rubble towards me. I hoped he wouldn't be able to tell I had been crying.

"Hi," I said softly. Clint looked at me for a second once he'd sat down. We sat in silence for a while, enjoying the peace.

"Want to sleep in my bed tonight?" he asked. I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Please," I murmured, resting my head on his shoulder.

He gently pressed a kiss to my forehead.


	7. Powerless

**See disclaimer in chap 1 :)**

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**12:56 pm**

"You shouldn't be going!" Jan yelled at me, eyes flaming.

"What?" I said, pulling on my right hand glove. I looked up at Jan, heart thrumming at her fierce stance.

"You're injured Hawkeye. You should not be going today." I refrained from rolling my eyes.

The Wrecking Crew had robbed a bank truck and the cops were struggling to hold them off. IronMan (who was now back with the team) had called myself, Thor and the Captain to come and help out. We were leaving soon.

Well, we were meant to be leaving soon. Jan had come in, raging fiercely, telling me I shouldn't be going.

And I had no idea why.

"You're still injured from Wakanda – you should not be going." I stopped and looked at Jan with confusion.

"How do you know about that?" I said, picking up my quiver.

"You told me!" exclaimed Jan, marching back and forth across the room.

"Jan, it's no big deal. I'll be fine. We've dealt with Wrecking Crew before – we'll get it sorted easily." I shrugged, now picking up the bow that IronMan had made for me after that Vision guy destroyed my last one.

"Clint." Said Jan. I looked at her again. She watched me seriously. I felt a sudden tension in the room. She walked around my bed and approached me.

"Be careful," she murmured, finally looking away. I suddenly wished I could stay with her.

"Hey," I lifted up her chin and gently kissed her. "I'll be fine, okay? But I have to go now. Okay?" Jan nodded and I kissed her forehead. "Don't wait up." I smiled and she laughed softly.

As I left the room I heard her sigh deeply.

Why should she not want me to leave? Jan had been fine with it before. She'd been fine with everything and anything before.

Her concern made me smile but it also made me wonder. I'd hid my feelings as best as I could but had she picked up on it? Jan was a lot smarter than she acted.

Or was it not me? Could she..? But she wouldn't. Couldn't.

I forced myself to focus as I flew out with IronMan and Thor. Jan would only be a distraction today.

**8:24 pm**

I made my way upstairs, grumbling about today. That Destroyer thing was bloody creepy.

And Thor had kind of been an arse about being mortal. I was mortal every single day and I did alright. He spends a few hours as one and suddenly all life in the history and future of _ever_ is over.

"JARVIS, can you order me a pizza? Or some fries?" I said, walking along the corridor to my room.

"Pizza Hut is running slow today, sir. Would you prefer your normal order from McDonald's?" replied the AI.

"Yeah, whatever," I replied, opening my bedroom door. I was exhausted – dealing with whiny superheroes really took it out of me.

I had thought about finding Jan but JARVIS couldn't locate her in the Mansion. I left her be – clearly she didn't want to be found.

I flopped onto my bed – my muscles ached and my head hurt. I wanted fatty food and sleep. And maybe sex – if Jan showed up.

It was about five minutes later when there was a knock at my door.

'This had better be good.' I thought – my food was yet to arrive and I was starving. I got up slowly and they knocked at the door once more. I yanked the door open.

"Wha-" I began before seeing it was Jan, holding my order of MacDonald's in an extra-large bag – meaning the meal itself was extra-large. My face broke into a large grin and I pulled her into the room. She dropped the bag onto my bed and handed me my drink. I refused to take it, instead pulling her into my arms. "Thank you," Jan laughed softly in my ear.

"I didn't think bringing you dinner merited such a response but thanks." She walked over to the bed, her shoulders strangely tense.

"Everything okay?" I asked, joining her on the bed and pulling out my food.

"Of course," Jan smiled widely – I hoped it wasn't fake. Why would she lie to me? Had I done something wrong? "So, movie night tonight?" she asked. I nodded, biting my burger.

"For a little while." I winked at her and Jan laughed. I smiled and we spent the rest of the meal joking around. Soon enough her shoulders eased up and her smiles came easily. I was glad I could cheer her up, even if she wouldn't tell me if something was wrong.

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Codename: Wasp**

**9:56 am**

"Miss Van Dyne, Captain America requests your presence in the Assembly room." Said JARVIS. I groaned and snuggled closer to Clint. After bringing him dinner last night, we chatted while we ate, watched about 10 minutes of a movie (which I don't even remember the title of... oops) and then proceeded to fool around. And now, after a night filled with dirty secrets, JARVIS was telling me the Captain needed me.

Ugh.

I was not in the mood for this.

"Miss Van Dyne, I must request you get up." Said JARVIS. I stifled a giggle.

I think that is the nicest way I've ever been told to get out of bed.

"JARVIS, please tell Cap' I'm not in the mood for getting up and that I will talk to him later." I murmured, hoping Clint didn't wake up.

Mind you, he was a pretty sound sleeper so it should be fine.

"Wasp today is the day that Whirlwind is being moved to 42. You assured the Avengers you would attend and assist if necessary. They are leaving in 20 minutes." I groaned again, this time rolling away from Clint.

"I'll be there soon," I said resentfully. I enjoyed my sleep – especially when I was in bed with Clint. It always felt safe. I looked over to the sleeping man – he looked so peaceful. Much more peaceful than he ever did when he was awake. I sat up and leant over, softly kissing his cheek.

I then got up and made my way around his room, picking up our clothes from the night before. His all went on the random chair he had (I still don't know why he has it) and mine hung over my arm.

"Where you going so fast, pretty girl?" came a sleepy voice from the bed. I looked over to Clint, half sitting up in bed. His muscles were taunt and tight. My stomach flipped, remembering how good those muscles felt against me.

"I've got to take a prisoner to 42 – boring S.H.I.E.L.D. stuff." I laughed and walked over to him. I kissed him on the mouth.

"Are you sure you can't stay?" he murmured once we broke a part. I half-growled at him.

"I wish," I kissed him again and walked from the room, praying no one was in the corridor.

As soon as I left the room, worry hit me. Had my feelings been apparent? Had he noticed? Did he think I was crazy?

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**10:43 am**

I sat, worried. Where the hell was Jan? The team wasn't meant to be this long – they should have been back hours ago.

I hate always hated the concept of 42. Hank and Mr Fantastic would have some serious answering to do if Jan was hurt. If she didn't come back.

I don't think I would be able to cope if she didn't come back. I would quite possibly go insane. When Widow betrayed me I still had a goal – to get answers from her, to get revenge. But if Jan was gone… there would be nothing. No next mission. No new bad guy to fight.

Shit, I was in deep. Deeper than I ever planned to go with Jan. I'd expected Hank to come back at some point and for her to call it quits, saying that he and her had made up.

True, I wouldn't have been happy about that but I would have dealt with it. But Hank never did come back and now, Jan and I were at this place.

I was madly in love with her and she had no idea. And I had no idea about how she felt about me.

And I so badly wanted to tell her how I felt. I so badly wanted to go the negative zone and drag her back here and confess my love to her.

Could I do that? What would happen if I did? How would she react? Why did the woman have to be so damn hard to read? I could not work out what she was feeling – I knew when she was over thinking, I knew when she was in pain, I knew when she wanted me to kiss her or touch her, I knew when she wanted to just watch movies and I knew when she needed to release of sex.

But for the life of me, I could not work out how she felt about me and I was driving me crazy.

And I have the feeling that the only way to find out is by telling her how I feel – it's just, the repercussions of that scare the shit out of me.

On the one hand, Jan feels the same and everything's lovely.

On the second hand, she freaks out and demands that one of us leaves the team and says she never wants to see me again.

On the third hand (I know we're only meant to have two hands but hey, I'm fucking a chick who can fly so shush), she is okay with the fact I'm in love with her and we keep doing what we're doing until she falls in love with me too.

All in all, not the best odds in the world.

At least from my point of view.

**11:23 am**

I had moved to the kitchen now and was eating some fries.

I think I have a serious addiction to fatty food. And coffee. But that's beside the point.

While I ate, I planned how I would bust into the negative zone and get Jan (and the other Avengers) out of there. Then suddenly the door opened and Jan walked in. I stood, a wide grin on my face. Jan smiled back at me. She looked tired and weary and I wished I could pick her up and carry her to her bed. I was about to rush over and hug her when the other Avengers walked in. I paused in my tracks and felt my face fall.

"What took you guys so long?" I snapped, not sounding the least bit authoritive, as I'd hoped.

"Oh shut up, Hawkeye." Said Miss Marvel, moving across to the coffee maker. My eyes narrowed and I longed for my bow. I would teach the stupid wench a thing or two. Jan subtly shook her head at me and I forced myself to relax.

"There were these bug… things; they attacked 42 – we had to destroy them all. With the help of the prisoners. Getting the villains back in their cells was the more difficult bit of the day." Joked Jan and I looked at her with horror.

"But… but the negative zone is devoid of life. There was meant to be nothing out there." I said, gaping like a fish. "That's why Ha- they put it there." I had gone to say Hank – that's why Hank put it there. But I knew it wasn't his fault – not entirely at least.

"It doesn't matter now. They were defeated in admirable battle." Said Thor, swinging Mjolnir. I nodded, still in shock.

"Is any one injured?" I asked, thinking of calling Jane in.

"We're all fine Hawkeye – the S.H.I.E.L.D. agents were very thorough when checking us over." Said Captain America.

"A little too thorough, if you ask me." Laughed Jan and jealousy flared within me. I prayed it didn't show on my face. I knew my jaw was tight and that my hands were balled into fists. Someone was bound to notice something. I needed to get out of there.

"I'm going to hit up the training room for a bit. I'll see you guys later." I left the room, leaving my fries behind.

**12:15 pm**

I attacked the bag, going through one of my more difficult routines. My eyes were trained on the bag, imagining the opponent darting around. I rattled off the quick round of punches, the bag shaking. I heard the door swing open and slam shut but ignored it.

I was covered in sweat. I went through the movements, repeating the sequence until I got it right – my muscles ached from the repeated movement. My head hurt from remembering the difficult patterns.

"Clint," said Jan softly. I kept punching, slapping, kicking. "Clint." She repeated a little more forcefully. "Hawkeye." She touched my shoulder and I instinctively reacted – I had her on the floor in seconds, now standing above her, chest heaving. Jan shrunk as I came to my senses. I stumbled backward, eyes wide. Jan reappeared in front of me; now back to her normal size. "Clint?" Jan's voice was careful, cautious. I knocked into the bag and spun, ready to attack. Jan reached out to me but then recoiled. I stumbled forward again and pulled the scared woman into my arms.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, nuzzling into her neck. I felt her nod against me. "I didn't, I didn't hurt you did I?"

"No, Clint… Are you okay?" she murmured, pulling away and looking me in the eye.

"You, you didn't come back. You didn't come back. I was scared because you didn't come back." I mumbled numbly, barely realising what I was saying. Suddenly I snapped back into my senses and pushed Jan away. She stumbled slightly and guilt plagued at me. "I'm sorry," I said, a little harshly.

Jan looked at me with wide eyes. I could tell I wasn't making any sense to her but I wasn't making any sense to myself right now. I wanted to tell Jan how I felt so badly it scared me but I was so scared that she would run away. What if she didn't feel the same way? What would I do then?

"Clint, stop. Breathe." I kept my eyes downcast and Jan lifted my head up with her hand. "Look at me. Hawkeye, breathe. You're okay, I'm okay. Everything's fine – I mean, you stink and desperately need a shower but other than that, everything's good, okay?" She stood on tiptoe and kissed my lips. I then fully comprehended what was happening and realised how crazy I'd been.

"I'm sorry." I murmured after she pulled away.

"It's fine, silly." She laughed, her eyes cheerful. "Now, I'm going for a shower, if you'd like to join me…" Jan turned and walked off slowly, her hips swinging. I hurried after her, grinning like a mad man.

So what if Jan didn't feel the same – she didn't know how I felt –

Well, at least I hope she didn't. With that outburst who could be sure.

Anyway, she didn't know how I felt and we still had this amazing relationship. I felt happy.

**Name: Janet Van Dyne  
Codename: Wasp**

**9:43 pm**

I sat in front of my mirror, combing my hair happily and thinking of Clint. After his strange behaviour after the incident at 42, he'd been incredibly affectionate.

Who was I to complain?

I'd escaped to my penthouse for a night, needing a break from the Mansion. There was too many men there – Carol rarely stayed. And if Clint needed me, he knew where to find me.

I looked back up to the mirror and gasped – the Vision stood behind me.

"Vision," I stated, turning in my chair. He reached out a hand to me.

"Please do not resist." As he approached me I shrunk, flying behind him. "I have been ordered to subdue you without damaging you."

Damaging me? That's an odd way to put it… Who could he be working for?

I tensed, deciding to find out.

"Not damage me - well, thanks. 'Cause going to make this really easy." My stings encircled my wrists and I flew forward, attacking. The robot-man stumbled backwards, clutching his face. "What do you want with me? Who are you working for? And _why_ would you combine green and yellow with your skin tone?" I demanded, firing madly.

I mean, seriously, _green_ and _yellow?_ Just those colours to begin with… Now is not the time.

I looped-the-loop and grew in front of Vision, punching him with my sting still around my hand. He flew back into my mirror.

On the plus side, Clint's training has been paying off.

On the down side, Tony was gunna kill me - that mirror had cost a lot.

"You – you should not have done that." There was a slightly more human quality to the Vision's voice and I paused. Before I could do anything, the laser from between his eyes shot out and burnt my shoulder.

I resisted the urge to call out for Clint – bad guys use that shit against you – as I fell to the ground, clutching my seared skin.

"I did not mean – Error. I have deviated from my programming. What is happening to me?" I barely heard the Vision as he stood above me. The pain was too much.

**Name: Clint Barton  
Codename: Hawkeye**

**10:26 pm**

I woke from to see a state of chaos before me. Cap' was crouched on the floor; Miss Marvel was walking forward, her fists glowing with Kree energy. The rest of the Avengers broke free. Copies of us stood across the floor with Ultron. Tony walked to the table and put on his mask.

"Avengers, pick a robot and take it down."

"Unacceptable." Said Ultron – he pointed to us. "Synthezoids, contain the humans." They rushed toward us and Wasp jetted forward. It was then that I noticed the red mark on her shoulder. It looked she had been burned.

What the hell had happened? Was it the Vision? _Ultron?_ I knocked an arrow, blood surging. I wouldn't fire until Jan was out of the way but my god, whoever hurt her was going to pay. I watched as she zipped around, dodging the ammunition fired by Robot-Tony. Damn that girl could move.

Then she did the strangest thing – she fired at the unconscious Thor who lay on the ground. IronMan fired at the Robot-Thor, while Miss Marvel rose in the air. Lightning crackled through the air and Mjolnir split through the roof. It knocked the Robot-Thor's head off and shot to Thor's hand, lightning still crackling. He rose slowly. Thor shot lightning at the rest of the robot and it exploded before falling to the ground.

Thor then began destroying all of the robots while I glanced around; making sure no one was attacking me or Jan. I had to keep her safe. I saw Robot-Miss Marvel dropping down to attack Thor – I fired three arrows in quick succession and the machine exploded. I couldn't help my grin. The real Miss Marvel dropped down beside me.

"Nothing personal." I said, smirking as she glared at me. We all stalked towards Ultron, knowing what we had to do. Destroy the robot once and for all. Thor slammed his hammer against Ultron's chest to no avail.

I swear to god, had he been human, Ultron would have been smirking. We continued to fire, despite Ultron's defiance. I heard Jan cry out in pain and I uttered a soft growl. I really hate Ultron – trust Hank to have been the one to create him.

Then the Vision guy appeared out of nowhere and thrust his hand into Ultron's chest.

"No, I will not allow this." Vision switched hands, the other one sticking into Ultron's head. As he pulled away, Ultron's head spun around and he sent an intense amount of red energy at the Visions head.

I'm glad I wasn't on the end of it.

"I see now that you, my first creation, were a failure." Ultron turned his whole body around and I tried not to gag. Robot or not, that shit is weird. I looked to Jan, hoping she was okay. "Failure will not be tolerated." Damn, this guy really shits me.

"I did not fail." Said the Vision in a voice unlike his normal one. "I achieved my objective – your head is now unlocked from your body." Ultron recoiled.

"Unacceptable." Before Ultron could do much more, Thor attacked – Ultron's head flew across the room, slamming into the wall, leaving a dint. The body fizzled and crackled as I approached Thor.

"Nice shot." I said.

"It was satisfying indeed." Thor watched the smoking body while I gripped my arm, looking for Jan. My eyes always seemed to be scouting for her – to make sure she was okay and to see if she was looking for me.

"What's his body doing?" she asked fearfully, her shoulder still red. Tony held his chest plate and I knew we would have to get him back to his lab soon. He rambled something science-y – before he could explain himself, Ultron's body shook and jumped around. Tony covered us in a shield. Ultron exploded, flames sprouting everywhere. I felt arms around me as pieces of the roof fell – Miss Marvel lifted me up.

I'd never noticed it but she had a pretty good body.

Don't worry, I still love Jan.

"Where's Cap'?" I demanded, when Tony landed outside with Jan in his hand. I wanted to take him from her and hold her close.

I really need to get a hold of myself.

Cap' emerged from the fiery building, the Vision in his arms. He set him down on the ground and we all crowded around.

"Vision, you saved all of us." Murmured the Captain. "Why? Why did you do it?" Vision joltingly raised his head. Cap' rested a hand underneath his hand.

"Ultron created me to be perfect. He thought that meant less human, to be cold and unfeeling. I wish to be perfect. But I believe that means to be more human."

We were all silent at the robot's words – Jan looked down solemnly and I longed to hold her. She looked so sad. The Vision seemed to die – I knew he couldn't but that's how it seemed. The feeling of grief and death encircled us.

**11:45 pm**

I lay in bed, alone, staring at the ceiling. I was thinking about what the Vision had said. And to what I had thought a few days ago – about my feelings for Jan. I had been thinking that I shouldn't tell her. That I just let my feelings run their course.

I couldn't imagine my feelings going away though. It felt like they were permanently affixed. I was in too deep. There was no going back now.

And the Visions words had struck me hard – "He thought that meant less human, to be cold and unfeeling." Was that what I was trying to achieve? A lack of emotion? I'd tried that in the past and look at where it had got me – betrayed by the person who I was closest to.

I knew I had to tell Jan; there was some deep seated need within me.

She had to know because telling her would make everything fall into place.

**Author Note: **_Hi all, I have been in a bit of a predicament - I can't decide whether to end the story here and then post one or two chap's of epilogue OR write 4 more chapters (taking us to the end of season two of Earth's Mightiest Heroes) and then one or two chap's of epilogue. If you could, please review with what you'd prefer. Also, let me know what you think of the chapter - this one isn't quite was I expected it to be. Enjoy :)x _


	8. Update Notice

Guys, I apologize with all my heart for the lack of update! Life has been hectic and I have been working on my own works so making time for my fics has been difficult. I promise updates soon! Apologies again xx


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